


Documentaries

by AshsHorrorShow



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Domestic, Drabble, Established Relationship, M/M, One-Shot, Shizaya - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-09
Updated: 2013-11-09
Packaged: 2017-12-31 22:25:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1037077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AshsHorrorShow/pseuds/AshsHorrorShow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A simple night of watching animal documentaries leads to some scary realizations...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Documentaries

It was a lazy Sunday night for the two infamous men who ruled Ikebukuro. The city of Shinjuku was lit up with city lights and cars, adding an illuminated background to the new life that was arising in the city. The people who lived out the night life. Partygoers, druggies, romancers, and random shoppers without anything to do during the day were now crawling out of their holes and bidding farewell to the daylight with eager delight. For new adventures were abound and now was the time to seek them out!

It was a new generation of people almost. Most people were wrapped up cozily in their humble abodes, sleeping on their dictated time. Few were extreme enough to live this kind of life, and those who did were bound to make the most of it before they paid for it in the morning.

Normally, Izaya Orihara and Shizuo Heiwajima would also be partaking in the nightlife within the cities of Ikebukuro and Shinjuku. Izaya was always being one of the troublesome night goers. Whether it be doing his job in general, pissing off Shizuo to the point where the blonde would go into a rampage, or just messing around with his precious humans like he always did.

Shizuo Heiwajima always prided himself as being one of the more casual city night goers. He would usually just stay out and smoke a couple of cigarettes, preferably with Simon if the Russian sushi owner happened to be out, watching the city rush by him. If Celty, Shinra, or anyone else he happened to pass by, he would make casual small talk with them. Idle chatter. The only time he really fringed the edges of being a troublemaker was when Izaya happened to piss him off.

Other than that, Shizuo was one of the more boring people. He just made idle chatter and then went to retire back home at a reasonable hour. Nothing more.

But tonight, neither man was frolicking around with the night crowd. The two infamous scourges of Ikebukuro and Shinjuku, instead, were casually sitting on the couch that rested in Izaya’s apartment, quietly watching television together. It was so silent in fact, that all that could be heard in the room was the buzz and chatter coming from the television, and soft whir of Izaya’s washing machine.

It may seem like a normal, peaceful scene for anyone else, but if someone from Ikebukuro was to walk into their apartment and witness this, there would be a high risk of a heart attack to occur. But for a while now, this had become a normal scene for the men when they weren’t killing one another all the time.

Both men that night didn’t have any work or other business to attend to, so they had simply decided to spend the rest of the night together in Izaya’s apartment since his was nicer. They had met up earlier, picked up and ate some Chinese takeout that Izaya had bought, before retreating to the living room to watch some television, figuring there was nothing better to do for the rest of the night.

To avoid falling into an argument, (Shizuo had a particular fondness for watching sports while Izaya seemed to have a fascination for kiddy shows), they’d flicked it onto an educational channel that displayed a bunch of animal documentaries on it. Both of them figured that no one really hated those, and hey, might as well learn something instead of fight right?

They had watched multiple shows of various different creatures. One had been about sea creatures and the Great Barrier Reef, another having been about a lion pride, and the other being about animals that lived in prairie areas. While not the absolute best thing either men ever watched, the shows had held their attention at least, and that was more than what could be said about other shows that frequented the tube.

But when they had gotten to the show about insects. That was the one that had brought a rather disturbing realization to Shizuo and had changed everything. It wasn’t as if the subject matter that had bothered either of the men. Shizuo had no fear of bugs whatsoever and while Izaya certainly didn’t like them, he wasn’t afraid of them. In fact, he used to torture his little sisters’ by chasing them with around, hopping a dead cicada in his palm and threatening to poke them with it. 

Ah, good times those were…

So it wasn’t the subject matter that had bothered Shizuo or Izaya, it was more a particular segment of the show. The moment the narrator of the documentary had transitioned into the subject of fleas.

“Oi, why didn’t you tell me they did a segment about you on this network.” Shizuo said, looking smugly at Izaya who was lying upside down on the couch childishly.

Izaya’s vermillion-red eyes narrowed slightly as he rolled them and said dryly, “Your wit truly knows no bounds, Shizu-chan.” 

Shizuo had quickly decided in order to keep the peacefulness of the night to ignore that snide little comment. 

The program went over a summary of basic facts about fleas, like how they sucked the blood of their hosts and buried themselves in carpet and so on and so forth. But the true point of interest, for Shizuo at least, had hit when the they got to the part of jumping.

Apparently, fleas could jump around about three centimeters at a time, which may not seem like a large amount to the basic human, but if you factored in the basic size of an average flea, a jump of three centimeters up in the air to them would be the equivalent of a human jumping over the Brooklyn bridge, making it roughly four hundred meters. The flea can also jump about 150 times its body weight which would be the height of two Statues of Liberty for the average human, roughly 230 meters. 

Not only could fleas jump at ridiculous heights, they could do a bunch of acrobatic flips when they did so using their strong little legs. They also apparently had the tendency to lay a lot of eggs and always come back… well, yeah. He could’ve guessed that one.

The show soon came to a close, and Izaya cut through the silence by saying, “Who knew disgusting little fleas could do all that?” Izaya then shuddered like he had the chills and said, “Bleh, makes me want to vacuum the room and office again…”

Shizuo was preparing to make some sort of sarcastic comment, when something hit him. A realization you could say. 

When he was chasing the flea around the city, Izaya would show off his extreme parkour as he flipped and jumped all over the obstacles that came his way like some sort of gymnastic acrobat. Just like how those fleas in the documentary had.

Then Izaya, like a typical flea, came to Ikebukuro to pester him, the ‘Dog’, no matter how many times Shizuo chased the little bugger off. Not to mention, like a true flea, he was a pain in the ass.

“Shizu-chan? You’ve been staring at me like a weirdo for the past three minutes now…. Is there something you want to say. I know I am irresistible, but still…” Izaya quipped out with a smug smirk, snapping Shizuo out of his thoughts.

“Izaya…”

“Hm?”

“Are you an insect?”

“Neh?!”

**Author's Note:**

> Haha! Another short little drabble I decided to post on here. Yeah, so I was watching that one old Animal Planet show called 'The Most Extreme', and they had shown a segment about fleas and it helped me learn all this cool stuff... so while I was boasting about my flea knowledge... the Durarara! comparison came to me and voila, this fic is born. I hoped you enjoyed! Critique is always a plus!


End file.
